Saturday, October 18, 2014

Back, back, back. Back again.

Dear blog/internetz/my creative side,

Last night as I was rolling around in bed in a delirious state only a good sickness could create, I had many revelations. One was that I missed writing. Missed sharing. Missed this tiny community I had been apart of. I missed reading. Reading for fun and reading for interest. I missed my spirituality. I missed having a direct purpose in my life. What am I doing?! I miss that feeling I had from kindergarten until about the first semester of grad school where I woke up each morning and squealed with delight, excited beyond belief to go to school. School has always been this magical place to me. School was designed with me in mind. The handwriting, organization, reading, note taking, socializing, sometimes competitive. I loved every part of it. But after about 19 years of straight academics, I'm tired. And I'm wondering, who am I? Who could I possibly be without school. And then I got worried. Do I keep searching for the next degree to complete because I am lost without school? School has eaten away at my whole identity. What the heck am I going to do without it. I'm so excited for life after school but then I find myself researching MBA programs across Canada.

This is what a good head cold does for me.